Saturday, October 28, 2006

Can you help us, please?

Monday morning a phone call came in with a bit of a strange request. Apparently someone who had this catalog thing before us decided to dump thier catalogs in the woods instead of delivering them. People walking along a provincial walking trail noticed them and called Sears to arrange for someone to pick them up. We became the arrangement. This was to be a super easy job and we thought a walk would be nice. So, we loaded up the van, took our little red wagon and packed some work gloves. Who knew what shape these old catalogs would be? We didn't want to have to touch them.
The directions were clear take this road to that road, turn right, find the well marked walking trail, walk 100 meters to the beaver pond, 100 meters past the pond and voila, find the catalogs and truck 'em to the warehouse.
We left the house at 2:30 fully expecting to be home by 4:30 or 5 at the latest, ready to make dinner.
We found the walking trail with no problem at all, but just to be sure, Caitlyn, Matt and Connor ran down the path to see if there really was a beaver pond. Yep there was, but it was 300-400 meters down the trail. Matt, Connor, Courtney and I grabbed the gloves and wagon and off we went. Just past the pond, the trail split into 2 trails. We figured if the pond was further than we expected so were the catalogs. Lets suffice to say that we walked forever through muddy, swampy, hilly, nasty trails for an hour... no catalogs.
We were freezing and I was exhausted from trying to look like I was having fun for the kids. This was NOT fun! Meanwhile, back at the van, Caitlyn is watching the babies and having tons of fun of her own as Molly had to pee... and they were stuck there waiting for us!
Thankfully we had the cell phone. Calling the guy at Sears was no help. He insisted we were in the right place and if we opened our eyes we could see those pesky catalogs. They were, after all, OBVIOUS from the path.
To the boys great delight, an army guy stopped to see if he could help us. I guess a lady waving her arms around speaking softly, yet FIRMLY into a phone while who knows how many kids are jumping around a van denotes someone needs help. Thank the Lord for this guy. Not only did he make the boys day by talking to them... he had a map. So did I. In fact, we had the same map... but he knew something I didn't know... there were 2 streets with the same name and one of them wasn't on the map!! This should not be allowed.
We went to the other street with the same name about 5 minutes from where we were (after taking Molly to the bathroom) and quickly found the walking trail. It was the same trail we were on actually, just further down. This was a straight as an arrow, dry, flat trail that was a pleasure to walk on. This was my kind of trail. The beaver pond was about 100 meters down the path, the catalogs another 100 meters down in the most dense thicket of brambles and alder bushes and burdock things you could imagine.
"OK, Mom, what do we do now?", Connor asks. I really, really wanted to say, "Go home and cry kid" but I didn't. Like a good mom I let the kids stay on the path as I blazed many trails through those bushes and threw the very waterlogged catalogs at the path for the kids to put in the wagon. They were strewn quite far down the trail. You'd think whoever dumped them could have had the decency to put them together, but no.
Just as I thought we were done, and I was certainly done, this was a job for prison inmates, Matt noticed the other side of the path also had some.
At 5:35 we were finished. Of course the warehouse to which these were to be taken closed at 5:00, but the "quick and easy" job was done. On the way to meet Dave, Caitlyn pulled out some tweezers and pulled the thorns from my hands. The workgloves were great, but they just shredded in the bushes.
Pizza Delight sure sounded good!! We drove in (no way was I cooking after this!) and just inhaled the wonderful aroma of pizza and garlic fingers cooking... Stomachs were growling... kids were grinning in anticipation of our wonderful dinner. There was no line. whoo hoo... We stood there for a minute or 2 when a frantic manager came out of the kitchen with this line, "Tell all your tables it will be at least a 45 min wait." We weren't even at a table yet. We left.
Ponderosa was a good choice!! All you can eat buffet! We ate until we could barely move and got home by 9 pm.
At first I wanted to forget this day... but now I want to remember.
Our circumstances were awful...
but we were happy...
we laughed at the ridiculousness of it all...
the kids will never think money comes easy!!
Next time someone has a quick and easy job for me, the answer is no.
When they want to know why, I will make them read this!!!

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Has this always been here??

I've discovered, if I journal a thought somewhere... on paper or here... I won't fall asleep right after my Bible readings. I'm a little surprised by this mornings Psalm. If I had read it last week THE RANT would not be on a previous post.

Psalm 4 (New King James Version)

To the Chief Musician.
With stringed instruments.
A Psalm of David.

1 Hear me when I call, O God of my righteousness!
You have relieved me in my distress;
Have mercy on me, and hear my prayer.
2 How long, O you sons of men,
Will you turn my glory to shame?
How long will you love worthlessness
And seek falsehood? Selah
3 But know that the LORD has set apart[a] for Himself him who is godly;
The LORD will hear when I call to Him.
4 Be angry, and do not sin.
Meditate within your heart on your bed, and be still. Selah
5 Offer the sacrifices of righteousness,
And put your trust in the LORD.
6 There are many who say,
“Who will show us any good?”
LORD, lift up the light of Your countenance upon us.
7 You have put gladness in my heart,
More than in the season that their grain and wine increased.
8 I will both lie down in peace, and sleep;
For You alone, O LORD, make me dwell in safety.


I remember all the "How long Lord.." Psalms, but this perspective was different.
"How long, o you sons of men, will you turn my glory to shame? How long will you love worthlessness and seek falsehood??"
I have a problem. I seem to love worthlessness... worthless arguements, worthless stuff, worthless ideals... I keep bitterness and resentment like it was some kind of treasure in my heart. How long??? Thankfully the Lord is longsuffering towards me, otherwise I'd have been snuffed out loooonnngg ago.
"There are many who say Who will show us any good?" Remember THE RANT? I should not be looking for others to show God's goodness. It would be nice if they did, but I should be looking to God for that. "Lord, lift up the light of your countenance upon us. YOU have put gladness in our hearts."
Boy did that smack me today. If I am looking for others to take the place of God in my life I will always be seriously disappointed. I need to look for God to be God... God to be God... I'm starting to get it... God to be God... Lord lift up the light of your coutenance upon me. You have put gladness in my heart. No one at church, or the neighborhood, or in my family can put gladness in my heart... only you can.
That is really too cool, and lets a whole lot of people off the hook.
How long will I love worthlessness?
Only God should be where I look for good.
The Lord will hear me when I call.
He will relieve me in my distress.
I can trust Him.
I can rest.

Monday, October 23, 2006

I am a friend of...

There is one song out there that I am having a really hard time with.
The choir sang it in church Sunday morning.
I'm glad my glasses are so screwy that I can't see to drive at nights so I have had to miss choir the past month, because I would not have sung the song... and I would have let loose a pet peeve that they don't need to hear.



Friend Of God - Phillips, Craig and Dean
Genre/Lang. : Christian
Who am I that You are mindful of me?
That you hear me When I call
Is it true that You are thinking of me?
How You love me
It's amazing (Repeat)

~Chorus~
I am a friend of God
I am a friend of God
I am a friend of God
He calls me friend

God Almighty,
Lord of Glory
You have called me friend

(Repeat Chorus)

He calls me friend
He calls me friend...

Most people are rip roaring crazy about this song. They just eat it up. Maybe I'm a nut, but I always feel that it glorifies me more than God. I, I, I.... I am a friend of God... sing "I'm amazing" instead of "It's amazing" and that is the feeling I get every time I hear it.
Personally, I don't think I'm the greatest friend God has and I'm not going to sing about it... I don't spend enough time with Him and I'd rather dwell on what He has done for me and is doing in, around and through me. I'm in awe of who God is. He isn't my buddy, He is my Lord, Saviour, Redeemer and Perfecter of my faith.
I am not His buddy, I am His servant, a warrior and forever in His debt because He paid mine. I am made His joint heir.... which I do not deserve. What a wonderful, awesome, amazing privalege to have to God of all creation be my Father, protector, provider, sustainer.... there is nothing about me that He should desire to love me, yet He does. It is a most lopsided arrangement. All I have for Him is my sinful self, which is all He wants. He is everything to me.
There is one part of the song I do like,

Who am I that you are mindful of me?

I am not His friend. I am His child.

Saturday, October 21, 2006

a withered leaf

Psalm 1 Blessed is the man.... But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and in His law he meditates day and night. He shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that brings forth its fruit in its season, whose leaf also shall not wither; and whatever he does shall prosper.

I must confess to being a withered leaf this week. Instead of delighting in God's word and studying daily, I've been busy. "Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things. But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her."

I am so glad we have the same name (never used to be!). Jesus is speaking directly to me, with my name. I need to refocus on what is NEEDED, a close relationship with Christ. There is certainly enough to keep me busy here... when I am in close fellowship with Christ, I have the same number of hours in my day... yet somehow... things fall into place. My house is cleaner, the kids are more obedient, schooling is done, bills are paid... My priorities are His priorities, I'm so much more joyful and even the kids comment. I can't control the things that are out of control, God does that.

I don't want to be a withered leaf. When life gets really dry and hard, I need to be feeding from my hidden source of water that the world does not understand. I need deeper roots.

I'm so glad God is infinitely patient with me. Good grief!! The things I don't get sometimes... or just plain forget.

No Bible, no breakfast.
No Bible, no blog.
No Bible, no hot chocolate.
No Bible, no email.

These are my resolves.

Thursday, October 19, 2006

I got a job!!!

Here we go..
For all of those times when I have said I will not go to work...
For all of those times I quoted from Titus 2....
For all of those times I was labled a wacko (love the term now that I know what a wacko is!)...
For all of those people who said I would work if the price was right and I was tired of home...
For all the times I said God would provide...
For all the times I said I would not work if it in any way detracted from what I do (or don't do) at home...

Yes, I have a job!!

I am making the most organic of organic, fresh milled muffins of various ancient grains for "my" physio/massage/pilates center. They are paying me what I want and think they are getting a bargain. Dave can't believe how much they will pay. 2 dozen a day to start, some might want extra dozens. I'll work 30 minutes to an hour a day and will get paid better than if I took in someone's kids for the whole day. In fact, the work will be done before the kids are up in the morning. God is soooo good!! Who knew this would happen. Its a gift! And I get to use my new oven every day and will now be able to pay for it!!

A big whoo-hoo for God. I don't even have to be out of my jammies!!!

I do have to be up early, while its still dark... to provide food... One step closer to Proverbs 31!! By the time I'm 75... maybe??

Help, God

Ok, I'm still not getting it. I've been up for 2 hours now studying your word and I'm confused. I know as a parent I have a responsibility to raise my children to honor you and love you... I realize that we all have different backgrounds, temperaments.. ya da ya da ya... but does anyone actually read the Bible anymore?? I'm reading all these blogs and websites of people all over the place that are striving to serve you and sacrificing their own wants to be what you want them to be. Why can't I find them here? I'm reading in John where if we love you we will obey you.. and in James where we need to act on what we read.. and Philippeans where we are to think about what is good, pure and praiseworthy... and how about the Proverb to train up a child in the way that he should go?
And here is my dilemma... christian parents who allow their kids to be nasty, malicious even, to other kids and think its cute because everyone wants to be friends with their kid... or parents who allow their kids to break the law because they think that law is silly and I'm the bad parent who thinks its wrong and doesn't want my kid influenced by this... kinda late since she already is influenced..
We have a wonderful, godly pastor who is leaving the church. He has taught us well, showed amazing love for his congregation and so has his wife. I have learned sooo much, been challanged, forced to choose to grow (or know I was choosing not too!). I have seen people petty and nasty to them, say horrible things to them and pretty much try to stifle their ministry. Did our pastor ever retaliate? I'm sure his knees are sore from the workout, he has only loved them more, and served them more. Yet, the people who are "the beautiful people" in the church have daily poisoned the church against their own pastor and his wife...
Not only that (I'm ranting but this is my blog!!) they fill their children with horrible movies which I wouldn't watch myself let alone let my kids watch, and then their kids put this filth in my kids minds AND THE PARENTS DON'T CARE.
We are exhorted in scripture not to forsake gathering together with his people, but where are his people??
Where are those that are set apart from this world? Where are those who hate sin? Where are those who are raising godly offspring?? Hello, God?? Where are they? You know what is going on... this is not a shock to you... you know my desire to raise children for you.. they won't be perfect, EVER... but I so want them to know you and love you and honor you in what they say and do...
and yet, as a woman, I need to stay back and pray and I have a hard time with this. I want to escape with my kids to a place where they will be nurtured and tended to until their roots are firm and they can withstand the attacks that are not supposed to come from the church. And this is considered a great church.
I kept my mouth shut. I did not tell anyone what I really, really wanted to. I would have only spoked what is true, but you didn't call me to be a Malachi, you called me to be a mom... a Mary.. a servant... your child... obediant and loving.. Please keep me in your word so that I will understand the lies of the evil one. Please keep my childrens hearts safely fixed on you, because I can't. Please help me to love your church, because right now I'm having a really hard time with that. Thank you for the gift of your son and for the loan of your servants who have led us and exhorted us to become closer to you these past few years... please bless the socks off them! Please help this church to know what they are throwing away. Please keep the minions of the evil one away from the children you have entrusted to our care. Please give me wisdom to deal with the parents in our church who don't seem to be doing a whole lot of parenting.... and then wonder why all the young people are not serving the Lord as adults. Please give me wisdom with the few people I know who are deliberately undermining our parental authority and mock my children's obedience... please take them out of the position of authority they have placed themselves in. I guess I should let you go God so you can get to answering this prayer. Oh, one more thing... please wake me up again tomorrow at the horrible hour you woke me up today... I really need to grow in you.. It was a pleasure beyond words to spend 2 hours just reading what YOU had to say today.
Please help the people who have the misfortune to stumble upon this blog today to forgive the personal nature of it.
I love you.

Saturday, October 14, 2006

Whoo hoo!! I'm lumpless!

This morning I was up at 6:30 am. I'm never up before 8...:30....9... you get the picture. And why the early time on a Saturday morning?? To go under the knife.
I got to have my head opened up and some of the extras removed. Some people have a deficiency up there, but in my family... we have extras!! The lump has been removed!!! Hoorah!
The surgery took about 10 min. Just a freeze, slice, pop and stictch kinda thing. The lump was like a soft marble and now my head hurts. I'm not terribly fond of stitches and I refuse to brush my hair until they come out. Its only 10 days! The curly hair gurus say curls should never be brushed anyway, so I'll be trendy. I think I'll stay home for a while.
FYI its really a weird feeling to have half of your head frozen. Its hard to stay balanced. I mean that in a purely physical stay on your feet kinda way. Intellectually (and emotionally) I'm perfectly balanced regardless of how much freezing is in my head....
Yeah, that sounded good.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

just ponderin'

Ever wonder why the smallest kids want to help the most?? Unless, of course its a much older child trying to get out of homework!!!
The kids are going out to stack wood for Dad. They want to get all of the split stuff stacked before he gets home to surprise him. This is Caitlyn's idea... Molly and Jack think its great! Molly is outta here, but Jack is drooling and his nose is running a marathon so he's confined to the house. Matt and Connor, who will be taking over all the wood splitting and stacking in the next few years, would rather do anything but help Caitlyn. She even has the little kids riding in the wheelbarrow on the way out of the garage!!
Its really cold today!! Time to switch the living and dining rooms around for the winter arrangement! The woodstove is in the 'dining room', but I need the couch in there so I can fall asleep over a good book in front of the fire. It might actually be warmer in here if we lit a fire.. no wonder Jack's nose is running!!

Monday, October 09, 2006

Happy Thanksgiving!!

I really should be doing dishes!! The kids are at AWANA, Jack is 'helping' Dad stack wood, Justin is happy, Dave's parents just left.... but I am soooooooo full!! Every year I promise myself I will not eat that much... Oh well, I did leave the extra piece of apple pie to eat when I watch 'The Amazing Race' with Dave tonight!!
I'm wondering if anyone else experiences the little extras that go with a really good Perry Thanksgiving. As we were setting the table, I realized the cranberry sauce had gone missing. Since Dave's mom and I are the only ones that eat it, no one else was concerned. I just bought it Saturday so I KNEW it was here somewhere... but it was definitely not in the kitchen... and we were not starting dinner without it. It seems that when the girls were putting the groceries away the put the sauce in the freezer with the cans of juice concentrate. Why I even bothered to look in the deep freeze for a can of cranberry sauce should tell you what kind of a house I live in.
The good news is cranberry sauce does not freeze. It keeps its jelly consistency, its just cold... so Caitlyn and Courtney were allowed to eat with us after all!!
Now Courtney is just a little thing, (Most people think she is 5, but she's 7) but she can sure pack away the food!! After 2nd and 3rd helpings she cut herself off to save room for dessert until she saw the drumstick!! Usually they go first, but for some reason there was a huge one with her name on it!
"Please, please can I have this?", she asks.
Being the kind Mom that I am I gave it to her. Next thing I know, this horrible shrieking comes out of the dining room. I thought she got a bone stuck somewhere, but no. She bit into the bone and one of her teeth fell out. It was loose, but not THAT loose. Dessert cheered her up though. Sugar is the best medicine!
Now Justin is playing with a doll on the floor, my coffee is gone, and Dave is still working on wood. I really should do some more dishes. I've only washed and dried 4 sinks worth... there should be 2 more to go. I'm so glad Verna did some before she left.
Lorne and Verna brought us an anniversary gift... its the swag chandelier from AVON that I loved in Verna's catalog. We have a swag lamp in our bedroom, but it shoots sparks when we turn it on. Actually, I think I'll go hang my new chandelier!!!

Sunday, October 08, 2006

Our day at Kings Landing

Caitlyn and her friend, Brittney take Jack and Molly for a walk.








Can you tell who loves to get her picture taken??

Connor having a blast at the kids games!!!

We loved how this tree looked against the old barn.
Today is a banner day! We had a great day at King's Landing, I made my first batch of Mustard Pickles and learned how to post pictures on this thing!!!
I promise to never again post so many pics in one day.
This is our Matt coming up from the dock.

Courtney dashing up from the dock.
Dave took a pic of me and the kids. In fact, he took 135 pics. There are none of him today though...
Jack was interested in every little detail of his day. He insisted on walking the WHOLE time.... you'd think he'd be asleep at 1:00 am then, wouldn't you?

Saturday, October 07, 2006

perfect days

I just had to stop in the middle of BUSY day because we are in the middle of the most perfect days of the year!!! I feel sorry for anyone who doesn't live here. If the beautiful colours of the trees weren't enough, now they are FALLING!!! Everywhere you look leaves are gently falling through the trees, piling up on the roads and "chasing" the cars. We are in the middle of the most perfect of settings, the sky is completely clear of clouds, darker blue straight up fading to white on the horizon. The river is the darkest of blue.
There is frost in the morning so the air is clean, clean, clean and smells like freshness. (Its actually decomposing leaves... I think 'Bounce' should add decomposing leaves as a new dryer scented sheet... Some of us would understand!!) We are off today to Kings Landing Historical Settlement which will be picture perfect today (I am determined to learn how to post pics on this thing tonight!!)... and because I am so full of energy we need to get out and do some walkin'!
Yesterday we picked 90 pounds of apples!! Molly and Jack were so excited... they knew apples came off trees but now the KNOW that apples come off trees!!
Tears keep coming to my eyes as I try to take in EVERYTHING.. the beauty, the excitement, my beautiful daughter as she has just had the perfect haircut... the kids think I'm losing it a little...
We are drinking in, and breathing in God's glory.
How will I handle Heaven?