What have I done now???

To say this has been a traumatic summer/fall would be an outrageous understatement.
Have I seen God's provision, love and direction?? Absolutely!!!
Have I learned to trust in all of this?? Obviously not.
In being overwhelmed and trying to do everything, in my "wisdom" I determined I wasn't doing a good job homeschooling and decided to put my kids in school. This was a stupid, stupid, and once more STUPID thing to do. 3 of the kids are back home. This was not working for them ... and 2 of them are still there. I am leaving them there until my HSLDA membership is in the works, just in case. Their marks are great, mainly because they are at least a grade level higher than their age appropriate peers. They fit in socially and even are complimented for their ability to take discipline well. Which unfortunately means that some discipline has been required... that is another story. Actually, it IS this story!!
One of the children has been having some "anger issues"... do ya think??
He's 11. The testosterone is hitting and there are some issues there for all boys to start with, then his Dad left, Mom was incredibly busy having a baby/surgery/house hunting and hunting and..../moving/attending a new school/making new friends, etc.. etc...
Do you think he might feel like exploding a few times?? I do. I can control it better as I am 28 years older than him!! He is learning control as well.
So, on the advice of many, and because I felt out of control, I took my son to a counsellor for anger management. Another BIG mistake. I should know better by now!!
Monday morning, to start my week I got blasted by this lady.
Apparently, I must be exaggerating the events of this year or I couldn't be so calm.
She doesn't believe that "giving my problems over to God for Him to take care of" is a viable way to handle stress.
I shouldn't be asking my kids how their day went when they come home from school, it is invasive of their privacy.
I have been HIDING my children from the world because of homeschooling and they are socially stunted because of it... Caitlyn's teacher's would strongly disagree to that one... as would anyone else who heard that!!
I am manipulating my answers to what I think she wants to hear because NO ONE could have 8 kids, love it, and be calm. I am *obviously* not telling of my real frustration of being a stay at home, housebound mom.
I say I still love my husband because I am trying to look like the sweet, innocent victim here where in "her experience" in a marriage breakup the 2 parties are equally responsible.
Amazing that she has such vast knowledge of my life before she even spoke to me. It was an hour and 45 min of constant haranguing.
My "homework" is to challenge my core belief system as my faith in God is *obviously* not working for me!!
I am wondering how some people keep their jobs!
What a load of crockery. She is supposed to be the best. I had thought a good counsellor listened first, asked questions, and gentle guided you to a workable solution. Apparently not.
She wanted to play "devil's advocate" as she put it. I told her I had enough stress in my life without scheduling someone in to criticize me just to "play" and I'm not interested.
I will send a lovely card to her as well to let her know that our world view, personal and educational philosophies are completely different and any further "discussion of my core beliefs" would at best be fruitless and at worst be driving me insane. I don't need or want this kind of "help."
I called two good friends who assured me this lady was the wacko and not me.
She had an educational background, which I found out after the first hour, and tried to explain to me why the public system was so much better for my kids in every way and told me the issues I have had a the school did not exist. She does not believe them. I must be a liar.

Not much you can do with that.
Feels good to get it out.
Parent/teacher interviews are rescheduled for Friday I hear. The teacher's haven't called me yet, though the voice mail from the school has said they would. If I don't hear from them, I'll just show up.

There is more.
I'll put another post up later.
Sorry to bore you with more problems, I do want this documented though and blogging gives me a chance to get it all down and have it dated.
Its a good thing!!

Settling In

Things are settling in here at the ugly on the outside/nicer on the inside little house of mine. All my wood is in.. and enough stacked so that I can safely manoever downstairs. I believe the rest may just stay in a pile as it is handy to the stove and will just be burned anyway. All the diehard wood burning people out there will cringe at the thought of a messy woodpile, but hey!! I don't care. I do need to clear a path to the water shutoff valve JUST IN CASE!! Other than that, about 2 and a half cords are neatly stacked and the rest is just done.
My dining room is lovely. People can walk into my kitchen, sit down and see all my pretty things. The wood in the table, sideboard and hutch is very restful. Teacups are everywhere... ladies bring your daughters for a teaparty anytime! I just need to get a new kitchen door (long story which will not be blogged) and gorgeous curtains. The navy gingham curtains are OK, Andrea LOVES them so they will be hers soon, but I am looking for something beautiful for there. Someday I'll have an hour or 3 to spend in a fabric store with no kids and.... who am I kidding?? Someday I'll drive the kids crazy with boredom as I crazily look through fabric at Walmart with at least 4 of the kids screaming to go to the toy dept, one will be teething and the ladies trying to peacefully browse will be giving me the "take your bratty kids and get out of this dept" look. Can't wait!!
My wonderful friend, Diane, lives 10 mins from the IKEA in Calgary and is shipping me my living room curtains. She also tried out a couch for me and made some recommendations on chairs for my living room that were invaluable.
Did I mention... no I did not... the furniture I have been eyeing for the living room is buy one get one half price this month? My wood was $400 less than my budget and the kids are forgoing Christmas presents until January so we can get our furniture!!!
They were liking the fact that if we saved money on the couches and then saved money with post Christmas sales, they could probably get more on the gift side.
That would be my sweet yet mercenary brood. My parents are up and have taken Molly and Caitlyn into town for groceries and gas. I thought later that they are notorious for getting lost. They've been gone a looooonnng time. Hope they aren't heading the wrong way up the highway.
Matt and Connor had a bunch of boys in today. 3 that stayed for hours and a couple more that flew in and out. I finally sent them on a scavenger hunt. They thought they were too big for it, but they sure are having fun!!
The little guys are jumping on the couch cushions on the floor, which is probably not a great thing for them to do, but... oh well.
The kids are all coming in. One of the Dad's called and said they were having deer burgers for dinner. I'm not sure if that is good or not.
Annnd they're gone.
I need to make supper.
The boys are off to Tae-Kwon-Do tonight.
Boys are wonderful, but I am tired!

Another storm... a real one this time

Matt and I just got in from the great outdoors...
As I went downstairs to feed the fire I noticed the plywood over one of the "windows" blew off.
Yes, I need 2 windows. I think I will actually give this out as a prayer request as I can't swing buying and installing windows right now.
The storm is starting and will only get worse so Matt and I with hammer in hand went out to put the plywood back on... only we had no nails bigger than finishing nails and it looked like someone took the nails out of our wood... I hope not!!
We asked 2 neighbors for nails. The second one gave us a bucket of screws and a cordless drill... that was great!! Except we were doing this in the dark with buckets of rain falling and the wind whipping around. I wanted to grouse about men who let women and children do men's work, but realized this is MY responsibility now. I helped Matt do some drillin' and then he got a shower. He is now wrapped in a blanket on the couch and I'm getting him some cocoa... then I'll get a shower.
I am soaked and in soaked jeans... lovely!!
Thankfully my leather jacket is waterproof so I'm not as drenched as Matt. I also found that the eaves trough is in sad shape!!
I can only fix so much at a time. The roof isn't leaking... or doesn't seem to be so that's good.
I'm having a hard time tonight to not be ticked off at Dave.
That's my attitude though and only I am responsible to change that. God is good and He is helping!!
Off for the hot choc!